"Dark Kingdom" offers some kinky moments

LOS ANGELES (Hollywood Reporter) - As the title makes clear, there is indeed a dragon in "Dark Kingdom: The Dragon King." And the truth is it is a pretty fearsome one, breathing loads of fire. But because the creature winds up being taken down early on by one man (and one who doesn't even really possess the requisite Herculean physique), well, this ain't exactly King Kong we're talking about.

After that, this four-hour, two-night Sci Fi Channel miniseries fantasy that was seemingly co-produced by half the nations on Earth plays rather like "Van Helsing: The Really Early Years" and proves only intermittently compelling while battering home its message of love overcoming all.

Clearly expensively mounted and packed with notably uncheesy production values and visual effects, the mini is a dramatic retelling of the same German myth that is said to have inspired none other than J.R.R. Tolkien. It revolves around megahunk Eric (Benno Furmann), a young blacksmith in the Dark Ages who is blissfully unaware that his true identity, as Siegfried, makes him the orphaned heir to a conquered kingdom. Just why this should thrill him -- it's conquered, after all -- isn't immediately clear, but in true fantasy fashion this does put Mr. Identity Crisis on "the path to his true identity and destiny."

What also appears to drive the guy is the memory of a particularly kinky one-night stand with a woman (

Kristanna Loken) who identifies herself as "the queen of Iceland" with a straight face. Their lovemaking is preceded by a fierce confrontation, which appears to really intrigue Eric/Siegfried, who -- even after slaying the dragon and laying claim to a bunch of gold -- spurns the advances of wenches by saying he is "spoken for." The tryst, by the way, is pretty graphic (FCC alert!), and our hero also takes a nude bath in dragon's blood.

Besides the ultrameaningful night of passion that leads to the inevitable reunion, "Dark Kingdom" winds up being all about confrontation, betrayal, deception, lust, greed, black magic, weaponry -- all of the usual stuff that makes for a juicy period soap opera. There are curses and royal meltdowns (chiefly involving King Gunther, played by Samuel West, and Princess Kriemhild, portrayed by

Alicia Witt) as well as evil borne of a coveted treasure. Indeed, the cast (also including old pro Max Von Sydow) is pretty impressive, and they're put through their paces with a sure hand by director Uli Edel.

But you know how it is with over-the-top projects like this. Either you buy into its heavy-handed mysticism or you don't. There is really no in-between. The trappings can be eye-popping and wondrous as they are here, with Elemer Ragalyi's cinematography particularly rich. Once you get past all of that, however, you have a chaotic love story between people who put way too much stock in a single night of sex. Before concluding that destiny has brought them together, shouldn't they at least consider a real date?

Cast:

Eric/Siegfried: Benno Furmann

Brunhild: Kristanna Loken

Kriemhild: Alicia Witt

Hagen: Julian Sands

King Gunther: Samuel West

Eyvind: Max Von Sydow

Giselher:

Robert Pattinson

Lena: Mavie Horbiger

Hallbera: Aletta Bezuidenhout

Alberich: Sean Higgs

King Thorkwin: Gotz Otto

King Thorkilt: Ralf Moeller

Executive producers: Rola Bauer, Tim Halken, Andreas Grosch, Andreas Schmid; Producer: Konstantin Thoren; Producers/Visual effects directors: Volker Engel, Marc Weigert; Line producer: Marlow de Mardt; Director: Uli Edel; Teleplay: Diane Duabe, Peter Morwood; Associate producer: Klaus Badelt; Cinematographer: Elemer Ragalyi; Art director: Billy Keam; Costume designer: Barbara Baum; Editor: Roberto Silvi; Composer: Ilan Eshkeri; Sound mixer: Conrad Kuhne; Casting: Carol Dudley, Sharon Howard-Fields, Cornelia von Braun, Christa Schamberger, Anna Feyder.

Reuters/Hollywood Reporter